DVD Hall of Shame #1 - Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 1

Several disclaimers upfront about this review:
1) I have read the Twilight books and quite liked them even though I didn't realise it was young adult fiction when I bought the first one.
2) I didn't mind the last Twilight movie.
3) I was on a plane flying to Thailand when I watched this movie in the seat back screen.
4) There will be spoilers in this review so do not read if you are planning to see this movie and don't know what happens.

Do any of the above influence how I felt about this movie?  Possibly the third one (when you watch movies on a plane to Asia they have usually been cut, plus there are so many stops and starts and distractions on planes) did contribute but I think no matter where I saw it, it would still be a stinker.  The first half of the book was so boring and this whole movie is the first half of the book.

The plot of this instalment is very basic - Edward and Bella get married, go on their honeymoon, fall pregnant and have a baby.  That is why the movie is so boring.  Literally nothing of interest happens for the first half an hour at least.  The wedding is sappy and the honeymoon is sooooo slow and dull - Bella's "seduction" attempts on Edward are laughable.  For a real-life hot and heavy couple, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson don't have a lot of chemistry even when acting out the sex scene which of course is heavily veiled for the teen audience, just as the book was.  When Bella realises she is pregnant with a half human-half vampire baby, which should not be possible in the book's mythology, things do start to happen.  The main one being that the werewolf pack finds out and decides the baby must be killed, which splits the pack as Jacob vs the rest.  The vampires must band together to protect Bella, who is fighting her own battle against the baby inside her which grows too fast and has a thirst for blood.

The only action in this movie is a brief vamps and werewolves vs werewolves fight which is well executed.  Everything else is just really dull, with even cornier dialogue than previous outings and Jacob rips his shirt off and runs off into the forest, muscles rippling, inside the first 3 minutes.  The thing I found most annoying was the bits in the book that were left out of this movie, even though being split into two instalments there should be more time to cover things off.  One of the more interesting parts was how Rosalie was made into a vampire and therefore why she is the only one who sides with Bella about the baby - this is all skipped over leaving you wondering why she is suddenly so protective when she had previously been very cold towards Bella.  Another part that was not conveyed well in the movie if you haven't read the book was how BIG of a goodbye Bella is saying to her family as she leaves for the honeymoon.  With her plan being to be turned into a vampire after the honeymoon, she will not be able to see her family and friends anymore.  However, you wouldn't really understand the emotion from the movie and Kristen's acting, other than to think "wow, that was an extra long hug".  OK, perhaps disclaimer #1 above does influence my view of the movie a little.

In summary, the movie is corny, boring and very average.  The ending does promise something more interesting to happen in the final instalment, as the ruling Volturi clan get wind of the baby's existence and speculate on what her special power may be and how it might be of use or threat to them.  Do not read the next sentence if you don't want a spoiler - stop reading now.  The funniest thing about the ending is that it seems to be quite promising of action and drama, but if you've read the book, you will know that it is all a bit of an anti-climax.  Will I be going?  I think I'll wait for DVD.